Dear First-Year Self
- Students In Mind
- Oct 29, 2019
- 2 min read
Updated: Nov 11, 2019
Anna Nuechterlein
Dear First-Year Self,
I know that this is scary. You’ve just moved across the country to start a new chapter of your life. You are experiencing a plethora of new feelings, a messy concoction of lonely, excited, sad, confused, hopeful. First year will be difficult. You are going to experience anxiety and depression, feel a type of loneliness you’ve never felt, face extremely low lows, and question who you are and who you intend to be in what feels like the most transformative, pivotal, chaotic time of your life. I’m here to tell you that you will be fine, I promise. Hang in there. Things really do get better. First and foremost, you are going to make friends that feel like family. I know it’s corny, but they will become home away from home! You will have pillars of support and hope through the challenging times, when you feel misguided, stressed, and hopeless. They’ll give you some of your most cherished memories, make you laugh so hard it hurts, and guide you to start loving yourself, in spite of your insecurities and flaws. Never forget that you are loved and cared for. What a gift!
Despite meeting great friends, you will feel lonely. A lot. Later, you’ll learn that most people felt this way in first year, and you weren’t alone in feeling alone. The best part is that you will actually learn to appreciate this time with yourself, and look forward to solitary activities. You will feel at peace with being alone, whether it’s listening to music, exploring the nooks and crannies of Montreal, reading a good book, painting in the park, or even just studying at a café. Feeling comfortable with “you time” will be an important step toward acquiring self-acceptance and self-love.
Moreover, you’re going to find purpose and inspiration through developing hobbies and joining clubs that make you feel happy, invigorated, and fulfilled. Through McGill clubs, like Jam for Justice and Students in Mind, you’ll meet like-minded people who share your passions for music and mental health! When you volunteer for senior citizens in the community who are isolated and lonely, you’ll begin to feel like your actions matter; that you can make a difference. You will find important ways to brighten your mood, alleviate your stress, and ground yourself
like painting, jogging outside to Parc la Fontaine, or baking peanut-butter cookies.
First-Year Self, I come baring bittersweet news: despite the immense progress you have made, you’re going to feel the bad stuff again. With every significant change in your life, the adjustment period is tumultuous, riddled with insecurity, self-doubt, loss of control, lack of direction. But you’ve been here before, you survived these transitory feelings and emotions, and you came out stronger and more self-assured than you’ve ever been. Ultimately, you will settle, find inspiration, and purpose, as you progress to new (and exciting! and scary!) stages of your life. I’m here to tell you that you will be fine, I promise. Hang in there. Things really do get better.
Love,
your Third-Year Self
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